If you’ve discovered that your partner has been having an affair, you may feel like your whole world has been rocked; your illusions have been shattered; your emotional life has been devastated. It is a heavy blow to bear, and for many people it spells the end of the relationship or marriage.

One of the hardest questions a person asks themselves when they find out about their partner’s infidelity is, “can he cheat and still love me?”

Let’s look at how you can be supportive to a partner with erectile dysfunction:

1. Take yourself out of it
2. Get Informed
3. Ask Him What You Can Do
4. Talk About It
5. Encourage Him to Seek Professional Help
6. Engage in No-Pressure Physical Contact
7. Try Sex Anyway, and Have a Backup Plan
8. Don’t Give Up

Let’s take a look at the options in front of you for helping your depressed partner. Please remember, though, that you are not responsible for your partner’s mental illness, and you cannot make it go away. The best you can do is try to help. If things don’t get better, it’s not your fault. Like anything else in life, all you can do is try your best; you cannot make their problem go away by force of will, by nice gestures, or anything else.

How can you know if you and your partner are compatible? Read this post to find out what you need to know about choosing a partner for life.

Before you buy something, you probably want to know whether it works. Fair question. You don’t want to buy an electric ab stimulator if it’s not going to work to tone you down to a […]

When discussing the Five Love Languages with people, every now and then someone poses the following challenge: why do I have to learn to give in the way my partner receives? Why can’t they learn […]

When I bought my house, the previous owner had left behind a motley assortment of old household items – boxes of ancient textbooks, fireplace utensils, a poker table, and a 6-foot tall cast-iron fluoroscopy machine […]

If your child is experiencing negative feelings that persist to the point that they are not functioning properly, then they might be suffering from a depressive disorder. According to the Centers for Disease Control and […]

This article was originally published on Social Work Today. One of my least favorite questions to get from potential clients is, “How many sessions will this take?” I hate getting this question because the true […]

One of the most commonly visited pages on this website is, perhaps unexpectedly, the blog post from 2017 about the Love Language of “Acts of Service.” It seems people want to know not only what […]

There is a classic joke that advises newlyweds to put a penny in a jar every time they have sex in the first year of marriage, and then take a penny out every time after […]

Divorce stinks. Even when it’s the best option, it’s still a bad option. And this is doubly so when there are kids involved. (Actually, that’s probably an understatement. A divorce with no children is painful; […]

At the end of the day, the decision whether to tell your family is up to you. It is wise to consider the pros and cons before making such a choice. Pros include family support and helpful outside perspectives. Cons include the ramifications for the future of your relationship, and the possibility of getting “help” you don’t want, including pressure and judgment, from your loved on.

Okay, so you blew it. You stepped outside your relationship and had an affair. And you feel terrible about it. Now what? Do you tell your partner what happened? Move on and hope they never […]

Sleeping in separate rooms (sometimes horrifically called a “sleep divorce”) is a hot topic these days. Is this normal? Is this okay? There are two approaches we need to consider in answering this question, depending […]

False. Well, that was easy, right? Okay, it’s a little more complicated than that. Life is not black and white. So let’s understand what we’re looking at here. For the purposes of this post I […]

In a recent post we discussed how to listen in a way that improves communication and reduces arguments and fights. In this post we’ll talk about the other side of the equation, that is, how […]

The holidays this year will be different than ever before. COVID considerations will have to play into every decision we make about our plans. Are you willing to get into an airplane, or will you […]

Do you ever feel frustrated that you’re trying to communicate something to your partner and they’re just not hearing you? Do you try to get your point across but find yourself sucked into arguments over […]

When two people share a child in common, the relationship between the two of them is hard to sever entirely. Certainly when the children are young there is a lot of physical care that goes […]

Our everyday way of living as we know it is disappearing. We are distracted and thus lose connection to others as well as to our own heart. Most of us were taught that busyness and […]

From the current health crisis to the unstable job market, life is pretty overwhelming these days. In fact, CNBC reports that 55% of Americans are more stressed now than they were at the beginning of the year. […]

Infidelity is as old as the institutions it violates. Many, many people throughout history have been hurt by a partner’s choice to step outside the boundaries of their relationship. Understandably, many betrayed partners are plagues […]

Have you thought about going for marriage counseling, but can’t figure out how to bring it up with your spouse? Or maybe you’ve brought it up with them, but they haven’t been interested? This is […]

I frequently get calls from people who are unhappy in their marriage and are looking for some professional help, but their spouse just isn’t interested. I want to address some of the most common objections […]

If you are an avid reader of this blog, you already know that the three most important words in a marriage are not “I was wrong” – they’re actually “help me understand.” (Check out the […]

These are definitely challenging times. COVID-19 has us cooped up in a serious way, and many of us are dealing with any number of other problems, including employment, schooling, and possibly health. Your marriage is […]

Let’s be real. This is, in the true sense of the word, unprecedented. We’re all a little anxious. We all know people who are in the higher-risk category. Many of us are facing a good […]

If you’re really old school, you may be thinking that the title of this post refers to the quaint, genuine, and meaningful “I love you.” If you’re a little more modern, perhaps you’ve heard that […]

Family conflict is a part of life. There is no family without some level of discord and disagreement. And most families survive intact despite it. However, in some families the level of conflict is elevated […]

Crummy things happen. They happen to you, they happen to me, they happen to everyone. You may feel you get more than your share of them. But nobody is spared the aggravations of daily life […]

One of the important components of anger management is getting an understanding of where your anger is coming from so that you can work towards not only managing your anger when it comes up but […]

People who struggle with anger management problems often feel like they are not in control when their anger gets the best of them. Have you ever felt like you go “from 0 to 100 in […]

Have you seen this alarming article yet? ‘Picky’ teen goes blind after diet of only fries and chips, study says. Apparently a British teenager refused to eat anything but “french fries, Pringles, white bread, processed […]

There are many reasons adults may decide to stop talking to their siblings. Old wounds from their childhood interactions are a major culprit, as are ongoing personality differences that cause friction. Often a major life event will lead to a break, such as a Thanksgiving dinner gone awry, or, regrettably, the death of a parent and the inheritance squabbles that can ensue.

In our last post I offered some ideas on how parents can go about reconnecting with adult children who have become distant and disconnected. In this post I’d like to talk a bit more about […]

You spent decades of your life raising your children. You poured your love, time, effort, and money into giving them the best life you could. Sure, you made mistakes along the way, but you tried […]

One of the most read posts on this blog is where I talk about Is It Okay for Married People to Watch Porn? Recently a commenter asked the following question: What about marriage counselors that […]

There’s been conflict in your family for some time now, and you’re ready to finally get some professional help with it. Strong personalities within a family can make it very hard to change the system […]

Is your relationship struggling, and couples therapy didn’t help? What else can you do about it? One answer is – try couples counseling again. Here’s why.

How often do normal couples have sex?  As frequently or infrequently as they want. This question is erroneously based on the idea that there is some number, or even a range, that we have to […]

There are many couples therapy techniques you can try out on your own. Here are a few you can start with today!

As the wealthiest person in the history of the world, Jeff Bezos can make news just by switching his preferred brand of morning coffee.  However, the news of his impending divorce (and immediate attachment to […]

New Year’s resolutions – everyone makes ‘em, few keep ‘em. Why is this so? And how can we do it differently so we can finally make our New Year’s resolutions stick?

As the holiday season bears down on us, many folks find their anxiety levels spiking in anticipation of yet another stressful family holiday. 

Crushed. Devastated. Hopeless. These are some of the emotions you may be experiencing if you have recently discovered that your partner has been having an affair.

Recently I had the great pleasure of going to an escape room for a bit of family fun. If you’re not familiar,

Can it really be so simple? Is there really a Single Most Important key to relationships?  Yes and no.  Obviously there is no magic spell for fixing relationship problems or keep relationships vibrant and connected […]

It is generally accepted in today’s generation of parents that praise and encouragement are the tools of choice in childrearing rather than some past methods such as yelling, shaming, and, of course, whupping. Praise and […]

Most people have never been to therapy before and are understandably a bit nervous about what the first therapy session going to be like.  If you’ve gotten up the courage to make that first appointment, […]

The end of a relationship is never easy, especially if you’ve been together for years.  This is true even if you know the relationship was going sour, or was unhealthy to begin with. The truth […]

If you’ve never been to relationship counseling before, the whole thing might seem mysterious, confusing, and downright frightening. The truth is it’s really not as bad as you think it is. The representations of therapy […]

Recently I was interviewed on the radio to discuss the question of how to prioritize your relationship with your spouse vs. your kids. You can listen to the 20-minute segment here. Here’s the spoiler: I […]

Change is hard. This is a truth I live by professionally, but it is also a reality in my personal life.  This week we are moving to a new office, and I must admit that […]

Are you trying to save a marriage that’s on the rocks?  Hoping to turn things around from anger and resentment to happiness and love?  It can be done.  Most marriages can be repaired if both […]

Texting is a very wonderful thing.  It allows us to send quick ideas and comments to our friends and families without having to catch each other at the right time.  It’s great for adding to […]

Although there are arguably some pros to pornography viewing as a part of your sex life, there are a number of cons that must be considered as well.

If you are considering seeing a couples counselor/marriage therapist to address a problem in your relationship, there are a few things it’s vital for you to know before you jump in. 1. Be prepared to […]

In these days of constant change and mobility, long-distance relationships are increasingly common and necessary as people take jobs and pursue life goals that move them about the globe. There’s no question that a long-distance […]

All relationships have ups and downs. Some seem to have more downs than others. A relationship that’s on the rocks can often be fixed with commitment on the part of both partners and with professional […]

Office politics are such a well-known phenomenon that entire television series have been successfully spawned from it. As most everyone knows, you are bound to run into difficult people at work. Fortunately, in most cases […]

Following the recent office shooting not too far from Baltimore, many people have been feeling increased nervousness and tension in their offices. Having trouble with a coworker or employer is a common experience; but who […]

Recently I had a conversation with a client about patience.  He was working on trying to be more patient, especially as it related to the people in his life, and found himself losing his cool […]

Anger is one of the major destroyers of relationships. People can say and do things when they are angry that are offensive, hurtful, even downright mean. But anger is a normal part of the human […]

If you’ve been feeling down a lot lately, always tired, not in the mood to do much of anything, you may be suffering from depression. Depression is different from just feeling sad, and it is a […]

This is a guest post by a colleague of mine in Chicago, Josh Hetherington of the Northside Center for Relationship Counseling. Mindfulness Lately I’ve been reconnecting with some Buddhist writing. It underscores a lot of […]

Arguments are a natural part of any relationship. No two people will agree on everything all the time. Disagreements are bound to happen. Slight offenses are inevitable.  But how do you deal with them in […]

Many people believe that infidelity unavoidably spells the end of a relationship.  However, the truth is that many relationships survive the injury of an affair, and in fact many get much better in the aftermath.  […]

Check out this review of our practice picked up by Inside Business Weekly!  You’ll see why we’re considered the place for the best couples therapy and how we can help you achieve the relationship you’re […]

Young children are constantly running to their parents to show them what they’re doing or playing with – “Mommy look! I put a hat on the baby doll!” “Daddy, see the picture I drew?”  Often […]

I’d like to share with you a handy parenting tool that is easier to use than it might sound.  It’s nothing brilliant or novel – just one of those things sitting under your nose all […]

Another common battleground for parents with young children is mealtime.  Getting kids to eat their proverbial veggies has been a vexing problem since time immemorial.  Just as we noted with bedtime, it’s unlikely you will […]

If you have young children, you don’t need me to tell you what it’s like getting through bedtime.  The hassle, the arguments, the frustrations – it happens to all of us.  Don’t worry – it’s […]

All too frequently, the couples I see in my office for marriage counseling/couples therapy are at the end of their rope.  There has been trouble in the relationship for a long time; months, years, or […]

Okay, so, we’ve talked a lot about the different Love Languages. But how do you know which is yours? Below we’ll discuss a couple of ways you can try to determine which language fits you […]

We’re taking a break from our regularly scheduled posts on the Five Love Languages to bring you this exclusive special in which I was invited to a local TV station to do a short bit […]

The last of the Five Love Languages is Physical Touch.  This one is in some ways very easy and in some ways very hard. It’s very easy because it’s pretty clear what we’re referring to […]

The fourth of the Five Love Languages® is called Acts of Service.  For some people, actions indeed speak louder than words. Of course, just as with Words of Affirmation you can’t speak nicely while neglecting […]

The third Love Language is Receiving Gifts.  This one is easy to grasp, but it sometimes gets a bad rap because to some people it smacks of materialism.  In fact, a person whose Love Language […]

In the last post I described the love language of Words of Affirmation.  The second language is called Quality Time, and you probably have a fair idea what that’s about without needing much a definition.  […]

Words of Affirmation is the first of the love languages described in Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages system. For people whose primary love language is Words of Affirmation, it’s what you say that counts.  This […]

The Five Love Languages® is a great tool for improving relationships, whether you’re at the beginning of a new relationship or you’ve been married for decades.  It is a very simple and understandable method of […]

Following up on our last post, let’s talk a bit about what possible red flags to look out for when searching for a therapist in Baltimore or anywhere else.  Unfortunately, as we mentioned last time, […]

So you’re looking for a therapist in Baltimore.  Maybe you typed “Baltimore therapist” into Google and it sent you here.  But how do you find the right “Baltimore therapist” for you?  What goes in to […]

This is a question I get asked all the time. How long will it take?  How many sessions do people usually need?  People rightly want to know how much time and money they will be […]

What is couples counseling? Couples counseling goes by various names: couples therapy, marriage counseling, marital therapy, relationship counseling, and more. These are all ways of framing the same process, namely, trying to help a couple […]

Ever find yourself in a situation where a fight is brewing and you know it’s coming but don’t know how to avoid it?  Check out this link for a post explaining just that. http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/how-to-stop-fight-with-your-partner-before-it-starts-1004164

In the previous post we cited a number of examples of role changes that can lead to conflict in the home and the importance of family therapy for managing these transitions.  There we focused primarily […]

Why do relationships between mothers and daughters that are warm, loving, and peaceable turn into battlegrounds of conflict and frustration?  What happens that causes such a drastic change, often in so short a time? The […]

We frequently get calls for family therapy, specifically regarding troubled mother/daughter relationships.  These include young parents with school- or preschool-aged children, middle-aged women with their teenage/young adult daughters, and even up to elderly women who […]

If you are looking to catch your husband (or wife, boyfriend, etc.) cheating on you, you actually have two problems at hand, not one.  The first, of course, is that your husband might be cheating […]

If you’ve just discovered your boyfriend or husband watching porn online – perhaps extensively – you may be feeling shock, anger, disappointment, betrayal, and more.  You also may be confused about what this means for […]

Call today : 443-598-2821 (you can text us too!) Getting started on the process of therapy isn’t easy.  Especially if you’ve never done it before, you might be a little bit confused or nervous about […]

Check out this recent article for which I was interviewed by ABC staff: http://www.abc2news.com/bachelor/millennial-love-one-right-swipe-at-a-time It discusses modern dating and how technology has made a significant change in the dating landscape.  There’s no question that Tinder, […]

An amazing thing happened in my house last night. I was out for the evening, and I came home to find a tired but relatively cheerful wife and three sleeping children. This is what I […]

I’ve noticed that a lot of requests for help that come through e-mail, text, or sites like Thumbtack.com list “save my marriage” as the reason for seeking help. So I thought I’d let you know […]

Bariatric surgery and self-esteem are obviously intricately intertwined with each other. Most people who suffer from obesity naturally struggle with their self-esteem, especially in a culture such as ours where beauty and thinness have been […]

Yes, this is an actual picture of me at something like 15 and my real-life mom. I believe we’re on a biking trip in one of the Carolinas.  The exceptionally poor quality is due to […]

When someone has an affair and is discovered or comes clean on their own, their instinct is often to soften the blow and/or minimize the damage, especially if they still care about their partner and […]

This is a powerful article describing what it is like to be a victim of domestic violence – and what victims want you to know. http://www.mamamia.com.au/domestic-violence-victims/ Learn more about our domestic violence education services here.