If you’re in a long-distance relationship, you know firsthand how difficult it can be. If all relationships take work, then long-distance relationships doubly so. You’ve got to face all the same challenges as any other couple – communication, dealing with conflict, relationships with family members – and then on top of that you’ve got the stress and strain of being apart for long stretches at a time. This can be a big drag on your ability and desire to communicate about difficult topics, on your emotional connection, and on your general satisfaction with the relationship, not to mention the havoc it wreaks on your sex life.
Couples Counseling for Long-Distance Relationships
So now you think you may want to seek couples counseling to iron out some problems between the two of you, or perhaps to see if it’s even something you want to continue with at all. But of course, it seems awfully tough to find time for counseling during the short periods where the two of you are in the same city. Once again, the realities of the long-distance relationship prove to be more challenging that you had hoped.
Fortunately, we can help you through this difficult situation. We offer online counseling so that we can meet you wherever you are. Commonly one partner will be located here in Baltimore and the other is stationed somewhere else, so we can have one of you in the office and the other can join in on videoconference to take part in the session. We can also meet with both of you online, whether you are in the same location outside of Baltimore or two different locations.
What will you gain from counseling?
Communication can be a particular challenge in long-distance relationships. We are experts at helping couples improve their communication and learn to talk about the important issues in their relationships. The skills you’ll gain are no different from the ones you need in a typical, co-located relationship – but in a long-distance situation they are all the more necessary.
You’ll also get a chance to talk about the issues that are particular to the challenges faced by long-distance couples. Here are some you may be familiar with that we can help you work out:
- How to maintain a sense of connection across the distance. Are you satisfied with video chats? Phone calls? Text messages? What works for you and your partner to feel like you are a couple, not just pen pals?
- How to manage travel back and forth. Who goes to who when? How often? How does the travel impact your energy levels, your desire to spend time together, your wallet?
- How to discuss the financial aspects of a long-distance relationship. Travel is just one aspect of it, albeit a potentially pricy one. What about rents and mortgages? Joint and separate bank accounts? Budgeting discussions? All these are questions to address.
- How to handle your sex life, including questions of exclusivity, jealousy, and sexual frustration. Are you both able to maintain sexual fidelity in these circumstances? Is that an important value for you, or are you both more interested in keeping a non-exclusive relationship for the time being?
What should you expect?
You should expect to be treated with empathy and understanding by your therapist. We take our responsibility seriously to help you get the most out of your relationship, whatever form it takes.
You should expect to get help for the problems you’re trying to solve, not the ones you aren’t. We won’t try to convince you to get out of a long-distance relationship if that’s not what you’re looking for. We’re here to support you in making what you think are the best decisions for you.
You should expect to work hard. Any relationship comes along with certain challenges and struggles; relationships that carry the extra challenge of making it work over the distance all the more so. If you are looking for a quick and easy answer to this conundrum, we probably don’t have it.
You should expect some technological difficulties! Even in the best technological environments, nobody can guarantee that all systems on both sides will work according to plan. So let’s all remain patient and make the best of whatever the internet allows us to do on any given day!
Get in touch with us with any questions you have – we’ll get back to you ASAP. We can also schedule you for a free 20-minute consultation where you can meet with a therapist, online or in person, to get a feel for who you might want to work with and what the road ahead looks like. Or, if you’re ready to jump into counseling and get to work on your relationship, we can get you started with a session, digital or live, within a few days. Be in touch and let us know how we can help!
Working on Long-Distance Relationships
Shawn and Monica were very much in love, but the stress of the long-distance relationship was weighing on their engagement plans. They weren’t sure how to deal with the issue until they found the Baltimore Therapy Center, which offered them sessions in person and online while Monica traveled in and out of Baltimore.
Arun and Patricia were struggling with a long-distance relationship that was on and off for years. They couldn’t seem to get it to work, but missed each other too much every time they broke it off. Arun called the Baltimore Therapy Center for a free consultation and they decided to give counseling a try. Online sessions were greatly helpful, and they were able to move forward with their relationship in a way that worked for them.
Elaine and Gary met online and almost never got to see each other in person, but they felt very connected and were torn about whether to continue with the relationship. Online sessions from their respective locations on different continents helped them clarify their needs and desires.
Check out our blog posts on long-distance relationships, including “How do you Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work?”
There are many couples therapy techniques you can try out on your own. Here are a few you can start with today!
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Highly professional but down to earth. Both my husband and I felt completely understood and valued; something couple’s often fear simply cannot be achieved. I’m sure we’ll return we need a “tune-up”!
Raffi made me enjoy going to therapy. I have learned to talk through issues that seemed impossible and I feel so much better about the communication in my relationship now.
My boyfriend and I see Raffi and it was the best decision we ever made. It is hard to gather the right words to describe him and how much he has helped us and our relationship.
Caitlin is so special. She is an excellent listener and offers valuable and practical advice for improving life circumstances. I would highly recommend her to anyone looking to grow and improve their life situation. Thank you!
Raffi, was professional, insightful, and helped us.
Raffi is a wonderful therapist. He’s understanding, warm, and thoughtful. He does not shy away from difficult or sensitive topics. I highly recommend his practice.
I am so thankful to have found Raffi. I feel so comfortable and confident when speaking with him. From small issues to major life decisions I have benefitted from his warmth and genuine care. I can assure you that Raffi will be an invaluable asset to your life.
Caitlin has been a mentor and guiding force for me over the past 10 years. She has spent countless hours listening and sharing her wisdom with me. Despite her very busy schedule, Caitlin has always made herself available to help when needed. Somehow, no matter what else she has going on in her day, when we are speaking I feel like I am her sole focus and priority. Caitlin is a very genuine, very caring person, and has a tremendous amount to offer her clients.
Raffi Bilek is a phenomenal resource. He actively listens before he speaks, and provides meaningful feedback and direction that clearly reflects my unique situation. His comments are wise, productive, and well thought-out. His humor also helps me feel comfortable and makes him relatable – sometimes it is the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down. I am indebted to him for his active listening and articulate, wise, and compassionate guidance. Thank you!
I cannot speak highly enough of Raffi. In just a couple of sessions, Raffi has already began to successfully impact our marriage. Both my wife and I continue to be impressed with him and our progress each week.
Thank you so much for all of your help and guidance, especially tonight. Both my wife and I were impressed and grateful for your willingness to work with us despite running a significant amount of time over. You are genuine in your demeanor and sincere with your advice. You are patient with us and seem to balance when to listen versus when to overrule us perfectly. Our confidence in you has grown to new heights and the value you offer is truly evident in our everyday lives.
Raffi is so easy to talk to. He makes you see things clearly. I’ve only known him a short time and almost immediately i was able to change things that were bothering me. He keeps conversations light and sometimes funny. He’s a great guy and I recommend him to EVERYONE!
I’ve worked with Raffi for six years, and from the beginning, he’s been VERY understanding of my unique situation and has been unbelievable helpful in guiding me to where I’ve gotten to, going above and beyond any expectations I had. I honestly can’t thank him enough in this small text box for what he’s done for me, but I’ll try – thank you, Raffi Bilek!
Just wanted to drop you a quick to once again thank you for all your help. I honestly felt Tim and I wouldn’t be able resolve our difficulties. But you offered us a safe space to work on becoming more honest, direct and ultimately heard and valued . . . in such a short time, you worked wonders! One or both of us may return in the future but please know we’re both indebted to you. We’re back to cherishing our time with one another and back to looking forward to a long life as husband and wife.
You have rightfully earned the title, “Number 1 Therapist in Baltimore“!
P.S. – Do you recall we were trying to plan a vacation and Tim wondered if we could handle it without an argument? We leave for Greece next week and haven’t had one “ugly moment” since we last left your office. 🙂
Lisa & Tim
Raffi was extremely helpful with the problems I brought to him. He helped me see things clearly and work through my problems. I felt like he really got what I was saying and where l was coming from. I even felt comfortable telling him things I had never told anyone before. He was completely nonjudgmental, which was very important for me. He helped me think about a number of different problems I brought up. but he also referred me to other specialists for problems he didn’t feel comfortable addressing. Overall, I was very grateful for all the help he provided me and I can’t believe how many problems he helped me solve – even ones that l have been dealing with for years!
Raffi was very welcoming and easy to talk to. My boyfriend and I saw him for several months and found that he was able to relate to each of us and help us to work together and find solutions that we otherwise would not have thought about trying. He was generally able to meet at the times that were best for us and was available evenings which was great to accommodate our busy work schedules. I would definitly reccommend him to any of my friends or family and will likely see him in the future should I encounter any problems that I may need help resolving in my personal life.
Raffi is a great person to help you get through your challenges in life. He is attentive , listens, and genuinely cares about his patients. Since I have been going to see him I have become less stressed and am able to control my emotions a bit more than before. I continue to see him and hope to eventually be able to tackle these problems on my own one day. Until than I urge anyone having any issues to contact him and let him lend you a helping ear. Thanks Again Raffi.
I’ve known the people behind the Baltimore Therapy Center for over six years. I’ve found them to be kind, honest, and truly cared about what’s best for me. I’d come in just to visit if I lived nearby.
Working with Caitlin for several sessions over the years, I find she is able to validate the areas of my life (my marriage, time management, pregnancy anxiety, child rearing, interpersonal relationships, work/home balance) I wished to improve in my life, offering practical guidance and encouragement that I believed I could excel. I’ve had mostly one-on-one sessions and I have attended workshops on time management and another on strengthening my marriage. Caitlin is very professional–I found her organized, attentive and thorough. She made herself available when I had to reschedule sessions and she would follow up with me on her own time if she knew I was going through a challenging experience. She is one of the most top-quality people I have ever met. I enjoy her personality–she’s to the point yet incorporates much humor. I worked with her mainly when she lived in New Jersey but have reached out to her on occasion now that she is in Maryland because I consider her refreshingly insightful and positive. I would highly recommend working with her.
I met Caitlin about a year and a half ago. I moved into her community when I was newly married. I automatically felt comfortable with her. She has a warm disposition and so friendly. She really made an effort to get to know me. She periodically arranged “ladies night out” for moms and young wives to get to know each other and to have a break from their busy lives and just relax, socialize, and have fun. Caitlin was always eager to share information with me to help me in whatever I needed from yoga, to child rearing, to how to be a better wife and mom. Caitlin shared crucial information in a 2 part series workshop as to how to be a great mom and wife! I always admired her as being such a great multi-tasker juggling work, family life, social life, as well as making time for herself. Catlin is a devoted wife, mom, and friend. She is a growthful person always learning new ways to better herself.
Raffi is insightful, intuitive, experienced, and has a sense of humor. I have full faith that anyone who enters into therapy with him will gain a deeper understanding of themselves; his goal is to give you the tools that you need so that you can independently be responsible for changing your life to be better and more fulfilling. When I needed to include a therapist in my Masters thesis, without hesitation I called Raffi and asked him to help out. I would recommend Raffi to a friend or relative without qualm. Also, I have attended some of his workshops, and found them interesting, insightful, and entertaining. I heartily recommend these as well.
I will always be grateful to Raffi for helping me through a very challenging time in my life. Within a few minutes of our first meeting, I was comfortable talking to him. He’s a superb listener. As we continued to meet over the next several months, I continued to grow from our interactions and generally just feel better and more confident. I would highly recommend Raffi to anyone.